Rambo Ultimate Edition Gift Set - Have Canon Will Travel  
| I will always find it very ironic that Sylvester Stallone – who is a very intelligent, talented, and driven man – will forever be associated with two of cinemas most iconic marble-mouthed meatheads: Rocky and Rambo. It’s almost sad that such a smart guy won’t be remembered for writing the screenplays for most of his films (all of the Rambo’s and Rocky’s to say the least), or directing a good number of them; but will instead forever be associated with, “Adrian!”, M-60 machine guns, explosive arrows, and very unfriendly (and impractical) bowie knives. I hope his millions of dollars provides some small comfort to Sly as he approaches senior citizen status.
So it was with mixed emotions that I recently sat down to relive the actiony goodness of my youth by watching The Rambo Trilogy. Why mixed emotions, you ask? Simply put, every time I’ve gone to relive a magical movie moment from my childhood as of late I’ve emerged from the encounter felling rather let down. A lot of those classic moments are rather dated, and blah in comparison to the modern fare that I love. Which is really too bad…
Before going into John Rambo’s world I did a quick mental inventory of my collected Rambo knowledge. After a few moments of sorting out the debris I ended up with three images in my head: Rambo fixing a bullet wound through the judicious use of gun powder and fire, Rambo holding a bow loaded with an explosive arrow, and Rambo holding a gigantic machine gun (although my mental catalogue wasn’t sure if he was in water or land – both as it turned out later…). That’s it. No catchy lines, or particularly memorable sequences – just the character with props. Not an auspicious beginning.
First Blood is really the odd-man-out of the trilogy, if only because it’s more of a thriller than an action film, and has the most cerebral of the three stories (which really isn’t saying too much). In it John Rambo, a recently returned Vietnam vet, is wandering the country to find himself, and some old army buddies. Rambo is kicked out of the quiet mountain town for no real good reason and basically decides to wage a war against the asshole sheriff (Brian Dennehy) and his deputies (including a very young David Caruso), until they realize they’re having their asses handed to them and call in the army – who also get an ass whooping. Then Rambo’s old commander Col. Sam Trautman (Rambo was made by Uncle Sam – get it?), played by the awesome and reliable Richard Crenna, is brought in to talk the man down, and he luckily does before the lunatic can blow up the entire town.
Bizarrely enough First Blood is probably the least dated of the trilogy, if only because of its serious content, and the fact that Sly is down and dirty, crawling through the bush for a good chunk of the film. It’s a gritty film with decent performances and a good chunk of action for a 1982 film, and in my opinion is the best film of the three. Stallone does some actual acting in First Blood, and we appreciate just how abandoned this man who fought for his country really feels. After this things get rather formulaic.
Now wouldn’t you know it, but in the book First Blood is based on, and in the original ending of the movie, Rambo dies. But in typical Hollywood fashion the studio types wanted him to live (a decision later backed up by a test audience who didn’t want a depressing ending), which ended up costing them the skills of Kirk Douglas as Col. Trautman. Good thing they stuck to their guns on that one as their bank accounts would later attest to.
Since Rambo was alive and kicking they figured they’d better put him to use by killing some dirty commies! One screenplay later – co-written by Sly and James Cameron – we have Rambo: First Blood Part II.
This time around Rambo is reefed out of jail by Uncle Sam (literally and figuratively) to return to ‘Nam where he is to assuage public outcry by looking for some P.O.W.s. The whole P.O.W. thing was a pretty hot topic back in the eighties (Chuck Norris did his own trilogy around the same time), so it was a fairly topical excuse to kill bad people. In the midst of this escapade Rambo runs into Russians (dirty commie scum!), and a conspiracy that he crushes under the weight of his monosyllabic wrath, and some well placed explosives.
While watching the second film I couldn’t help but to notice just how dated it felt, with its shiny eighties glam, and a very, very synth-tastic soundtrack. It really did feel like it was over twenty years old, at least more so than First Blood. Otherwise it’s a decent film with lots of carnage – way more than the first film – and a few iconic moments involving the aforementioned M-60 machine gun, and a really cool bit using a wall of mud as a piece of camouflage.
With the formula firmly in place, three years later we are treated to Rambo III (notice they dropped the reference to the first film?). This time Rambo’s recruited out of semi-retirement in Thailand (where he fights for money to help some monks – which I’m sure caused a few real monks to puke a little in their mouths…) to help free a country enslaved by the evil of – wait for it – evil (dirty) Russian commies. Hey if it ain’t broke, why fix it? In the realm of beautiful irony, though, guess what impoverished Middle Eastern country Rambo goes to help? That’s right, Cold War CIA playground, and home to many current assholes, Afghanistan. Thank God I’m Canadian and can laugh at that…
The producers went out of their way in the third film to trim off all the fat they could, like a plot, and reduced the film to a pure action extravaganza. Everything is bigger for the third one: the explosions, the knife, the body count. It’s a pure and simple action flick. No mystery about what you get with Rambo III , which is probably why it sold so well, particularly with the 15 – 35 male demographic. We really are simple creatures, aren’t we?
And there you have it, all three Rambo movies in summary. Essentially Uncle Sam designs a killing machine who is left directionless after his initial objective is cancelled due to lack of interest. He blows up a small town and suddenly the government finds a new use for him in the cold war: killing commies. Unfortunately the cold war is drawing to a close as Rambo finishes helping out Bin Laden and he is put out to pasture. Until 2008 that is… Keep your eyes peeled for that one.
On the DVD side of things I recommend you look for the newer box set (NOT the Ultimate set) as it has a better picture quality, DTS sound, and way more special features. Really, go big or go home!
So through the eighties Rambo became the ultimate American, a visceral embodiment of their angst and it was through Sly’s progressively more intimidating physique that old Red, White, and Blue laid an ass-whoopin’ on all comers. For the time he occupied the zeitgeist Rambo was the penultimate American (strangely mirroring the decline in educational standards as well), and was pretty damn fun to watch.
So if you’re looking for a thoughtful and daring escape to the land of quality film, move on my friend, move on. But if you’re looking to relive the violent hey-days of Cold War film-making with an iconic Stallone, then by all means, leave your brain at the door, grab some popcorn and get ready to kick some commie ass (oh, and some sheriff ass too, but it doesn’t sound as cool).
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